Bug/Issue (Xbox) empty lobbies + multiplayer rules don't work

Guys, I have two consoles here (Xbox) and when I create a match, my wife (on the other console) can't see my match created (and vice-versa), so I have to invite her to play it. But what if I'm trying to play with randoms? I can't see any matches at all and I bet they can't see me. Quick match option works though.

Also, I changed some maps rule from "free for all" to 2vs2 and yet it shows four teams instead of two, and we can't change teams... So the changes aren't working. They do work on local multiplayer, but not online.

Just a quick note: both of my consoles have open nat